Really? We have to have THIS talk?

Dear Diary,

So this is the second time in a month... we had POOP on the floor today. It wasn't in the bathroom, where you might have guessed. Instead, it was on the floor in the classroom. UGH!

The first time (yes, I'm including details) it was a slice summer sausage lying on the floor... a poo poo patty if you will. Today, it was a streak. I thought I smelled something, but I couldn't pinpoint where.

We had the talk last week about not peeing on the toilet seat... I used such sayings as, "If you sprinkle when you tinkle... be a sweetie and wipe the seatie." I also explained that this was a boy issue because girls just sit and aim directly into the hole.

Now, what clever saying do I have? Can't explain that it was a "shart." A shart, if you don't know, is when you think you have to fart, but oops... took a shit. The two together is a shart. We are having issues with sharting. Is there a picture book for this? I could use... Maybe I will read the book pictured and go into more details.

This for sure will create some giggles from the audience.